WWE Presents: Elimination Chamber 2011
Matches announced:
- WWE Tag Team Championship match
- Tag Champions Santino Marella (the funny Italian guy) and Vladimir Koslov (the big mean Russian guy)
vs. - two members of The Corre, Heath Slater (the guy who looks like Wendy from the restaurant) and Justin Gabriel (the high flying South African guy who is too attractive to be a badguy
My prediction: The Corre has been trying to dominate Smackdown recently, and Slater/Gabriel are former tag champs from 2010 when they were part of the old Nexus group. I think the Corre is going to get some gold here. - Intercontinental Championship match
- Champion Kofi Kingston (the used-to-be-Jamaican-but-now-is-from-Africa guy)
vs. - Royal Rumble winner Alberto Del Rio (the guy with his own Spanish ring announcer)
My prediction: It's been a decent feud, but Del Rio is on his way to a World Championship match at Wrestlemania in April, so I don't think he will win this one. - WWE Championship match
- WWE Champion The Miz (the former Real World star who says he is AWESOME guy)
vs. - Jerry 'The King' Lawler (the retired wrestler who works as a colour commentator on RAW guy who is back for 'one more run' at a championship he never got a chance to win before)
My prediction: The star of this match will actually be the other announcer for RAW, Micheal Cole. He is a big fan of The Miz, and has costed Lawler the championship before. Lawler has never won the WWE title, but also he has never had a match at Wrestlemania. I see Miz winning thanks to Cole, and leading to Lawler vs. Cole in a battle of announcers at Mania. - World Heavyweight Championship match - inside the ELIMINATION CHAMBER
- World Heavyweight Champion EDGE (the Canadian Rated-R Superstar guy)
vs - Kane (the brother of the Undertaker guy), Rey Mysterio (the Mexican masked luchador guy), Wade Barrett (the leader of The Corre even though he says there's no leader guy), Drew McIntyre (the Scottish guy in a ponytail who has a crush on Kelly Kelly), and one unannounced 6th man (which used to be Dolph Ziggler before Ziggles won the Championship for a whole hour before losing it back to Edge and being fired by Smackdown GM Teddy Long)
My prediction: Edge will keep his 11th World Championship, leading to Edge vs. Alberto Del Rio at Wrestlemania. Dolph may return in a surprise way to fill that 6th spot, but if anyone other than Dolph gets that spot, that person will have the best shot at winning other than Edge. - Number One Contender's Match - inside the ELIMINATION CHAMBER
- John Cena (your girlfriend's favourite wrestler guy)
vs. - John Morrison (also your girlfriend's favourite wrestler guy who can literally grate cheese with his abs), R-Truth (the guy who raps his own entrance music but isn't John Cena), Randy Orton (also your girlfriend's favourite wrestler guy who is more badass than all the guys who have played Batman combined), Sheamus (the extremely pale Irish Celtic Warrior guy), and CM Punk (the straight-edge leader of the Nexus guy who is basically a cult leader that eats tofu instead of animal hearts in his rituals)
My prediction: The winner gets to fight the WWE Champion (currently The Miz) in the main event of Wrestlemania. I see this going to John Cena, because Cena has not won a single match yet in 2011 and he is due for one. Also, I think Randy Orton is more concerned with destroying CM Punk and the Nexus than worrying about the championship, R-Truth isn't good enough, John Morrison already had a title shot at the Miz and lost even though he is awesome, and Sheamus is so pale the cameras at Wrestlemania wouldn't be able to pick him up.
So there you have it - tonight's show starts at 8pm on pay-per-view or at the movie theatre, and it will lead us right into Wrestlemania on April 3rd.
Oh and by the way - THE ROCK is back :)
Oh and by the way - THE ROCK is back :)
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